Locus of Evaluation Part 1

Perhaps the most fundamental condition of creativity is that the source or locus of evaluative judgement is internal.

Carl Rogers (1998)

When I was thirteen my art teacher told me I wasn’t good enough to do art at ‘O’ Level and I believed him. Perhaps what he actually meant was, “you enjoy making art too much. You don’t take it seriously.” I used to sing and make noises and talk during my mark making. I once drew a still life that had the words, “ahhh, shit!” in it (I drew what I saw). Perhaps he disliked my enthusiasm because he’d lost his own. I didn’t take art seriously. It was fun. Until he told me I wasn’t good enough. I stopped making art and began journalling instead.

Using a journal is a great way of externalising what’s in your head and helping you move forward in your thinking. I invite my coaching clients to keep a journal during their coaching journey as it can help them reflect on various aspects of themselves and their relationships to people, events, things… It can also be used for creative writing and drawing. There are many ways of journalling and it can be as unique as you are.
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Being With Trauma Memories Without Shame

There’s something about the conditions of lock down that reflect the conditions of childhood and, therefore, trauma, for me at least. In fact last weekend I had a trauma memory emerge during my meditation. It was a small child part of me that was sexually abused and I was able to hold it and listen to it and respond to it.

Painting black lines and dots on this work in progress abstract painting helped me to process some of my feelings about the childhood sexual abuse memory that emerged. Using arts is a way of expressing something creatively that cannot be expressed in words. The process of using arts can be soothing.
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Legal High (2011)

Legal High (2011)
50 x 40 x 1 cm
Acrylic, emulsion, dish scourers, and anti depressants on canvas
£850

If you would like to buy Legal High please contact me.

I was going through a hard time with my mental health and my GP advised me to start taking anti-depressants every time I saw her. I caved in after yet another request for long-term psychotherapy was turned down.

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Constellation (2009)

Constellation (2009)
60 x 50 x 4 cm
Acrylic on canvas
£1,500

If you would like to buy Constellation please contact me.

I came home from work one evening in 2007 feeling frustrated and annoyed, grabbed the nearest canvas, which was painted in a block dark red and threw black paint at it, smearing it all over until no red showed; then I used my finger to draw the humanoid figure sitting on a chair.

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